Kiss and Tell: Tech-Fished

Are dating apps helping you find love or rotting your brain?

If you’re on social media, you’ve probably been targeted by dating app ads at least once. I started keeping track, and at this current moment I’ve gotten ads for 85 different apps. New apps and campaigns are popping up left and right, and so are the lawsuits.

Nowadays, most single people are on dating apps. According to the Match Group, 40% of all relationships in the US now start online and 30% of US adults are on them. To date, Tinder has 530 million downloads. That’s an insane amount of people on one platform. And to top it off, it was the most downloaded app of 2023. 

It’s hard to see the point in having so many apps, so what’s the benefit of getting into the dating app game? Now granted, every app has a different target. You have your originals like OkCupid, eHarmony, and Match.com, and your current classics such as Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge. And the apps only get more specific from there. You can pick an app based on your sexuality like Her, Taimi, or Grindr. You can pick an app based on your religion like Muzz, Christian Mingle, or Lox Club. You can pick an app based on what kind of dynamic you’re looking for with apps like Foursquare for double dates or Feeld for meeting singles or couples. There’s also random apps like WooPlus for meeting plus size women (which, as a plus size woman myself, seems like it can only be a hub for fat fetishists) or Turn Up to meet people based on music taste.

I could go on and on, but the point is clear: there’s a ridiculous number of apps. With so many, can they really be making money? Surprisingly, yes. 

In 2023, the dating app market made $5.34 billion. Billion. With a “b”. $2.8 billion of that total was made by the Match Group, which owns Tinder, Hinge, Match, Meetic, OkCupid, Pairs, Plenty Of Fish, Chispa, and even more sites. It’s definitely an illusion of choice when it comes to the dating app market.

The Match Group, hasn’t been loved by the public as their profits make them seem though. For years, dating apps have been under fire for the way they gamify dating. But now, they’re in a full-on class action lawsuit.

On Valentine’s Day of this year, six dating app users accused the Match Group of having preying on users and using features to deliberately keep users on the app in a California class-action lawsuit. They argue that apps violate consumer protection laws. They stated that, “Match intentionally designs the Platforms with addictive, game-like design features, which lock users into a perpetual pay-to-play loop that prioritizes corporate profits over its marketing promises and customers’ relationship goals.”

The Match Group has denied these allegations and has said that the outcomes are in the hands of the user and the apps are just a tool to be used, not an absolute solution.

All apps use their own proprietary algorithms that claim to show you your best matches, but they also put your best matches behind a paywall. Each algorithm works differently, and every company keeps the exact metrics close to their chest. Allegedly, the Hinge algorithm shows you people that match your profile choices and have the potential to match with you along with a ranked “like” system and what comments you leave for other users. Tinder allegedly has a much more straightforward formula: ranking you by how many people swipe right on you, scaled by how many people swipe right on the user that is swiping right on you. But no matter what the algorithm is, users are feeling at a bit of a loss.

The companies behind dating apps will tell you to your face that they don’t cause an addictive cycle, but they do. People are constantly deleting and redownloading them in hopes that something will change and a partner will appear out of thin air.

Even independently owned apps like Bumble aren’t free from scrutiny. They recently launched a major campaign, and it hasn’t been received very well. A few weeks ago they deleted everything off of their Instagram page and said a “big change” was coming. They teased the update across social media talking about how people were “exhausted” from dating. They pulled out all the stops by using all of their brand ambassadors and sending out tons of merch. They released a campaign video in which a woman joins a nunnery and swears off dating, until she sees an option that’s “designed for her” (Bumble of course) with the tagline “We changed, so you don’t have to.”

In reality, not much has changed. According to the brand’s own blog the only changes are letting women add an option for an automated first message, moving a few of the interests to the top of your profile, and a “glow up” (that looks practically the same to the original design).

It feels lackluster and underwhelming. The comments on their posts are flooded with annoyed users complaining about all the changes they didn’t make and about the issues with the platform. It’s clear most people feel like something is missing.

When dating apps first came onto the market, they gave an option to users to meet people without having to disrupt their busy schedules. There’s so many stories of people meeting on match sites and falling in love. But now, it feels like it’s starting to feel a bit monotonous, and I don’t think I’m alone in that sentiment.

People are spending money on subscriptions in the hope of getting OFF of these apps. Some people are opting to ditch them all together. It’s easy to feel like the next match could be your soulmate if you just keep swiping, but are you really building connections or just endlessly scrolling on strangers you’ll never talk to.

As with every week, I can’t give you a concrete answer on whether or not you should or should not be on dating apps. Depending on what you’re looking for, dating apps might be the place for you. I know multiple couples that have turned a swipe into a healthy and loving relationship (they are a possibility and not just an urban legend). I’m just here to keep you informed on all of your choices so you can make the best decision for YOU.

That’s all for now so keep it cute, stay safe, and I’ll see you next week.

XOXO, Gillian

Got dating problems? Email us at primadonna.kissandtell@gmail.com, and we might just answer you in our next column update!